This week was a bit of an ego-check. Perhaps it was needed. I was feeling pretty confident at the beginning of the week that my teacher was going to hand me the next pose in the Intermediate Series, which is Dwi Pada Sirsasana–both legs behind the head. I thought I was ready since I finally found some space in Eka Pada Sirsasana last week, after struggling with it for two months.
My teacher and the universe had other plans. On Tuesday, my teacher said to me after practice, “I thought about giving you Dwi Pada today, but I thought I better make you wait a few weeks..” “WEEKS?!” I replied. I’m not gonna lie.. I was a little pissed. I had worked super hard for Eka Pada Sirsasana and she was going to make me wait just because??
Then, on Wednesday, my Lady Holiday arrived and I woke up feeling like my body had been put through a car wash. I made myself get up and go to practice all week even though Ashtanginis (women Ashtangis) are permitted to take rest during the first few days of menstruation. There is also a ‘Super Blue Blood Moon’ coming up on January 31, everything started to feel out of wack from that. I was so grateful that I hadn’t been given Dwi Pada.
This experience really solidified my trust in my teacher and the practice of Ashtanga Yoga. There is a reason I’m not in charge of my own practice, and that I have to be given the poses. Sometimes my teacher knows me better than I know myself. If I were in charge, I would hurt myself. My teacher gently reminded me throughout the week to take it easy and to give myself permission to rest.
I was reminded of a quote by the current lineage holder of Ashtanga Yoga, Sharath Jois.
“Don’t think that asana makes good practice. Many students say, ‘Oh today, I caught my ankles in backbending, today is my best practice.’ Don’t think like that. Getting up and being on your mat and just doing what you can, that is sufficient and that is best your practice.” -R. Sharath Jois
Although nothing remarkable happened in my practice this week, I did my best practice all week. I’m happy with that.
More next week. 🙂