Witnessing my teacher struggle through her practice on Monday gave me some much needed perspective this week. I knew she was struggling because I know her practice and was watching her closely. But no one else in the room would have known because she didn’t bitch or moan or even let out a single winded sigh. Just like any other day, she showed up, focused on her breath, and did what her body told her to do that day. Afterwards, she did not dwell on the parts of her practice that she was unable to do. She simply said, “I’ll try again tomorrow.”
I was so inspired by her that day (and everyday)! I am so easily disappointed in myself when it comes to my practice, and I’ve realized that the reason for this are the expectation I hold for myself each time I step on my mat. It’s for me to view this practice as a daily obligation, but really, it’s a daily opportunity. It takes courage to show up to this practice and not care about what happens.
As I felt the energy of the full moon building in my practice this week, I cultivated the bravery to detach from the fact that it felt different, that it felt harder. I cultivated so much bravery and vairagya (detachment) that I allowed myself to take an extended moon day this weekend. I am listening to and respecting my body despite the lies my mind tells me.